Sunday, 25 November 2012


In medical term, a complication is unfavourable, the only defence mechanism we currently have is to foresee it/them, so that we can at least be prepared for them. It is as if the power of expectations can resolve everything. Almost.

In life, it is the same deal. Complications arise, especially during the times that you expect them the least, or during the times that you can least afford to deal with them, be it because you are short on time, or money, or both.

I can never be too prepared for life, can I?

After nearly thirty years of roaming the earth, I am convinced that it is very exhausting to live my life trying to live up to everyone's expectations. When I say "everyone", I really mean everyone. Especially when it comes to some people who somehow feel more entitled than others to have me doing things for/with them, dealing with their complications or to prevent their expected complications from eventuating to reality. With these people, if I make the choice to do one single thing that works better for me and my then-situation (and avoid complications in my life), or if I express my opinion about how inconvenient it is for me with a suggestion with how to do it, I am the bitch.

It is like I am the default bitch because I don't want to put them first.

I am not going to live my life and spend my time to make other people happy. If I live my life on those terms, I have this feeling that I am going to end up being the one dealing with endless complications in my life most, if not all, of the time.

As I have always said, love yourself first.

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